Tuesday February 03, 2009 (16 weeks, 2 days)Much like a hockey player during the playoffs, I've grown a beard during the pregnancy. The baby beard, as it likes to be called, is coming along nicely. While the baby has grown from the size of a lemon to the size of an avocado, my beard has gone from the grasslands of America's breadbasket to the temperate deciduous forest biome of it's eastern and western seaboard. As this is new territory for me, I'm not sure whats next. Will it continue wildly until becoming the tropical rain forests of the earth's equator? Will it tangle in on itself like the mangrove swamps of the most wheels off state in the union, Florida? Will the Discovery/Animal Planet/Science Channel Collective continue to show "Planet Earth" in beautiful HD so that I can continue to make miracle of birth/climate region/beard growth comparisons? Just as with the the spectrum of pregnancy, I don't have any answers to these questions of what lies in store.
4 comments:
As a beard expert, I recommend shampoo and not soap to combat the itchiness. Conditioner can also be a big help in achieving maximum beardage with minimal itch. Purchase a good bottle of beard lube (yes, this is real) and rub a bit in before you go to work to keep it moisturized.
If you name your child Stanley Cup Anderson, the world will look back and appreciate your playoff beard even more.
matt kelley, the smug pose of the photo was strictly for you. also, this is a genius idea.
Your beard is the size of Ulysses S. Grant's.
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